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Basically I played Star Wars: The Old Republic today.. (for all that don't know what it is. It's a MMORPG [Massive Multiplayer Online Role Play Game] set in the Star Wars Galaxy 3600 years before the actual Star Wars movies)
And I found out that I'm officially a Mentalcel, that's the reason I'm Incel it's my mental shit. I have OCD that's for sure, it's still in a light form but super annoying. I started playing this Star Wars game a week ago and deleted my created Jedi character 6 or 7 time, and my Sith character 3 times... I then start to cry, scream and shake intensively. My breathing becomes heavy and fast and I get panick attacks when I don't delete the characyer, when I delete it I feel even worse because I deleted 4-5 h of playing time. It's not that bad because it's easy to get to lvl 20 in this game (MAX IS lvl 75 anyway) but it's still annoying to start at the beginning planet all the time.
I also hit my head and bite myself.
From this you can already see it's over.
I'm never satisfied with the game or how I portress in it, I want my Sith to be super evil and my Jedi to be good. So I'm never sure which answers I picked in the mission conversations because my Sith always needs to answer bad and my Jedi always good (but I can't remember it when I progress) my highest level was lvl 23 Jedi, I deleted it 3 days ago or so.
Now I deleted all my accounts and the game too. I won't play for a week or so I'm sick and tired. But I will play after the week.
Just taking a break.
From 2017 to 2019 I had extreme from of hypochondria I thought I had cancer and made my mom visit all the doctors to check (I didn't believe I was healthy) I thought I had all types of cancer you can imagine, it was funny as shit. (Well.. u know) I was only 15 and 16 at that time. It was a phase.
In 2015 at the Ebola outbreak in Africa I thought I had Ebola and we gonna die in Europe where I live ( I was only 12 and already had mental issues etc.) I cried and was scared to death because of Ebola.
Because of Coronavirus that peaked in February 2020, i was so concerned that when if found that the first confirmed case
in Europe was in my country too...
I called my mom crying and scared to death, I then left school without saying anyone that im going home. When I was home I cried in front of my mom had mental outburst and was lying in bed for 1 day.
So yeah I basically get nervous breakdowns at least twice a month where I cry loud and hit my head and harm myself with my nails (just scratching lmao)
I regularly get anger outburst and my room door has a big (prob 13 inch) hole in it. I made it with my fists.
Im also a friendlesscel, skinnycel, acnecel...
I have severe social anxiety. I was grocery shopping yesterday where I bought something for my gaming session.
I have summer holidays now (well I dropped out of highschool) I saw a group of 17-18 year olds at the grocery store.
Chad's and stacys who went to my school they graduated all. So the chads were like 6'2 and the stacys 9/10. I had a crush on one stacy, she is 2 inches taller than me LMFAO.
So I started blushing because I was mogged and a submissive bitch.
Because I had a mask on no one saw it, (but they saw that it's me just my face was covered)
I then started shaking and feeling dizzy because I was socially awkward and I also have severe social anxiety.
That's it, when you read this it's not over for you if you are not like me.
Bye
PERMA ROTTER
And I found out that I'm officially a Mentalcel, that's the reason I'm Incel it's my mental shit. I have OCD that's for sure, it's still in a light form but super annoying. I started playing this Star Wars game a week ago and deleted my created Jedi character 6 or 7 time, and my Sith character 3 times... I then start to cry, scream and shake intensively. My breathing becomes heavy and fast and I get panick attacks when I don't delete the characyer, when I delete it I feel even worse because I deleted 4-5 h of playing time. It's not that bad because it's easy to get to lvl 20 in this game (MAX IS lvl 75 anyway) but it's still annoying to start at the beginning planet all the time.
I also hit my head and bite myself.
From this you can already see it's over.
I'm never satisfied with the game or how I portress in it, I want my Sith to be super evil and my Jedi to be good. So I'm never sure which answers I picked in the mission conversations because my Sith always needs to answer bad and my Jedi always good (but I can't remember it when I progress) my highest level was lvl 23 Jedi, I deleted it 3 days ago or so.
Now I deleted all my accounts and the game too. I won't play for a week or so I'm sick and tired. But I will play after the week.
Just taking a break.
From 2017 to 2019 I had extreme from of hypochondria I thought I had cancer and made my mom visit all the doctors to check (I didn't believe I was healthy) I thought I had all types of cancer you can imagine, it was funny as shit. (Well.. u know) I was only 15 and 16 at that time. It was a phase.
In 2015 at the Ebola outbreak in Africa I thought I had Ebola and we gonna die in Europe where I live ( I was only 12 and already had mental issues etc.) I cried and was scared to death because of Ebola.
Because of Coronavirus that peaked in February 2020, i was so concerned that when if found that the first confirmed case
in Europe was in my country too...
I called my mom crying and scared to death, I then left school without saying anyone that im going home. When I was home I cried in front of my mom had mental outburst and was lying in bed for 1 day.
So yeah I basically get nervous breakdowns at least twice a month where I cry loud and hit my head and harm myself with my nails (just scratching lmao)
I regularly get anger outburst and my room door has a big (prob 13 inch) hole in it. I made it with my fists.
Im also a friendlesscel, skinnycel, acnecel...
I have severe social anxiety. I was grocery shopping yesterday where I bought something for my gaming session.
I have summer holidays now (well I dropped out of highschool) I saw a group of 17-18 year olds at the grocery store.
Chad's and stacys who went to my school they graduated all. So the chads were like 6'2 and the stacys 9/10. I had a crush on one stacy, she is 2 inches taller than me LMFAO.
So I started blushing because I was mogged and a submissive bitch.
Because I had a mask on no one saw it, (but they saw that it's me just my face was covered)
I then started shaking and feeling dizzy because I was socially awkward and I also have severe social anxiety.
That's it, when you read this it's not over for you if you are not like me.
Bye
PERMA ROTTER
