Magnum
- Alea Iacta Est -
-
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2019
- Posts
- 537
My self confidence was never strong, barely there to begin with most of the time. I never knew i was actually unattractive until I found lookism type forums and learned what things are actually considered attractive. I never really knew about what facial features were good and height until I looked into it. And that helped me understand why my experiences on 'tinder' and other online apps and programs were so bad.
Tinder was the thing that made me realize that no females found me attractive especially as any kind of preference. It confirmed why peoples reactions to me in public was so bad. Tinder taught me that they all think the same and that I was literally noones cup of tea. It's what made me really lose value in myself and the opposite gender and any hope of being able to get what i want. But I kept trying because It's built in to me as an instinct and I can't help it
But the final thing that fucked me up happened recently.
I started talking to a female through a course I was on and we became good friends. Spent a fair amount of time with her and went to movies and stuff alot.
She was a very awkward social outcast with some facial deformities and was basically allergic to everything like the typical nerd on some tv show. among other nerdy traits. Not at all good genetic material for having a kid with, (then again id never want to curse a kid with my shitty genetics) but seemed like a really nice genuine person in a world full of whores, thots and self promoting degenerates. I really thought id met someone truly different who looked at me as having value and chose to know me over others (even though she had her physical flaws) And then she told me she only got to know me because she thought shed never be able to get anyone and then stopped talking to me and ghosted...
All this time i thought this weirdo looked up to me and cared and it was all because she thought of me as a last resort bottom of the barrel..
You know your fucked when the only person to give you time is awkward and deformed and then ditches cause they were only there out of boredom and having no other options...
now im friendless and still a virgin...
fuck not having any value to people
Tinder was the thing that made me realize that no females found me attractive especially as any kind of preference. It confirmed why peoples reactions to me in public was so bad. Tinder taught me that they all think the same and that I was literally noones cup of tea. It's what made me really lose value in myself and the opposite gender and any hope of being able to get what i want. But I kept trying because It's built in to me as an instinct and I can't help it
But the final thing that fucked me up happened recently.
I started talking to a female through a course I was on and we became good friends. Spent a fair amount of time with her and went to movies and stuff alot.
She was a very awkward social outcast with some facial deformities and was basically allergic to everything like the typical nerd on some tv show. among other nerdy traits. Not at all good genetic material for having a kid with, (then again id never want to curse a kid with my shitty genetics) but seemed like a really nice genuine person in a world full of whores, thots and self promoting degenerates. I really thought id met someone truly different who looked at me as having value and chose to know me over others (even though she had her physical flaws) And then she told me she only got to know me because she thought shed never be able to get anyone and then stopped talking to me and ghosted...
All this time i thought this weirdo looked up to me and cared and it was all because she thought of me as a last resort bottom of the barrel..
You know your fucked when the only person to give you time is awkward and deformed and then ditches cause they were only there out of boredom and having no other options...
now im friendless and still a virgin...
fuck not having any value to people