Serious I wish I could get rid of my desire for human interaction

[TheNEET]

This is the source of all my problems. The schema goes as follows:

1. I'm disillusioned with normies, I retreat into my internal world
2. I spend all my time interacting with fictional media, books, daydreaming etc.
3. My mental health improves, I feel better and want to try something new
4. Because all the media I consume deals with social interaction, I have a very idyllic view of it and want to start having friends "just like in my pony cartoon!"
5. I try to make friends and I'm treated so harshly that it's hard to believe, normies act like edgy cartoon villains
6. Rinse and repeat

The shit normies say to me in the 5th phrase is incredible. I've had cashiers randomly say that they hate me for no reason, I've had normies wish me death for recommending them a cooking recipe (this one happened very recently), several people very bluntly admitted to being ok with things like child rape or animal torture. When I tell others about it, they'll either say it's not really wrong and they agree (wtf), or that it's impossible and I must make stuff up. I'd go full schizo and claim gang stalking but I've seen it happen to others: I've seen someone write a whole fanfic about raping someone's family and murdering and eating the corpse of the person in response to some very mild opinion on Facebook (I think it was animal rights), when I reported it, Facebook drones decided it's not against community standards. Similarly recently I've read Mere Calvinism by Jim Scott Orrick and expected a book about religion but there were quite many fragments where the author admitted to enjoying abusing animals for fun and where he compared God to an animal abuser -- this is unnerving to say the least and normies rated it at 4.60 at GoodReads and no one really seems to mind it or even mention it in their reviews.

I think the biggest mental illness I suffer from is constantly excusing normies and trying to think "oh, maybe that's a bad apple". I haven't found a single good apple irl, as much as it seems unlikely, there seems not to be a single person who's not total scum and goes outside (I've seen some ok people online but similarly to me, they hide in their basements). Normies are cartoonishly evil and I'm constantly in disbelief how it's even possible but I can't ignore reality. I'm constantly gaslighted into going outside and trying to find friends because that should make me feel better and make my life worthwhile but normies are so evil that staying in my basement until I die seems to be the only tactic that won't lead me into insanity (well, it will lead me to insanity sooner or later anyway, but it's less dangerous). I wish I could just stay at home and feel ok with being friendless and never getting any affection -- it's the lesser evil.

 

[Deleted member 10150]

i can be ur friend

 

[Deleted member 21230]

Don't surrender your desires, it won't work. Instead use them to fuel your hate for normies and for what they're doing for us

 

[waste matter]

Don't surrender your desires, it won't work. Instead use them to fuel your hate for normies and for what they're doing for us

 

[Deleted member 21768]

Unless it's a gf, I have 0 desire in human interaction. Either a girl to be affectionate with, or I'm fine by myself as I don't want to hear about other people's problems that are not as bad as mine.

 

[Deleted member 1983]

always remember that humans are just monkeys playing dressup , a lot of us are immoral and selfish and act based of primal desires

 

[Irredeemable]

Just become schizoid

Schizoid personality disorder - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[incelerated]

Sometimes I wish I didn't have any libido, but I feel like I'd lose my sense of masculinity if that actually happened.

 

[mentally lost cel 1]

Don't surrender your desires, it won't work. Instead use them to fuel your hate for normies and for what they're doing for us