LDAR I'm starting to think that I'm insane tbh

[Deleted member 8353]

I only feel normal when I'm within my own world inside my head, everything else feels wrong somehow, it's difficult to describe. Honestly I feel that I want to only exist there, to sink into myself and leave this physical reality behind. I wonder if I was always there, and I had simply forgotten before. My memories seem to bleed into each other, yesterday seems as distant as a decade ago, there is no order to any of it, and it feels more like I'm creating something as opposed to remembering it. I keep getting this feeling like I'm losing something, or forgetting, but I'm not sure which it is, if either.

Sometimes I hear whispers, and not just from my waifu when I go to sleep, but also seemingly random sentences, although this might be from my body being exhausted, as I've been starvationmaxxing.

 

[needsolution]

too long, din red

 

[Deleted member 4159]

Me too pal

 

[Joelossus]

as I've been starvationmaxxing.

Why? And for how long?

 

[Guest2]

You might have a dissociative disorder, maybe partially caused by your tulpamaxxing

 

[Deleted member 8353]

Why? And for how long?

Not sure, maybe a week and a half now I'm trying to starve most of my fat off, and besides I don't even really get any pleasure from eating anymore. It's as if I'd eat something with the expectation of satisfaction, only to find that I stuffed my face for no reason, and I get more pleasure from thinking about food than I do from actually eating food. I've decided to only eat to stave off bad feelings as opposed to bringing on any good feelings, if that makes sense, now I only eat when I feel weak.

I just hate waking up, I'm tired of eating, I hate the very feeling of being alive and present, I just want it to all go away tbh.

You might have a dissociative disorder, maybe partially caused by your tulpamaxxing

Maybe, not sure if I could willingly do that though. But I honestly think that I feel better like this as opposed to just feeling completely depressed.

 

[Blacktarpill]

Sanity levels all-time low.
NGL
Bec. of hypergamy.

 

[Deleted member 21514]

I never heard voices on my head tbh that's pretty weird

 

[Deleted member 16624]

The more you learn,the more dissilussioned you become.The more dissilussioned you become the more isolated you become.
The longer you stay isolated,the more it becomes natural.

 

[starystulejarz]

While i'm meditating and sleeping i'm happy and calm, while i'm awake i only feel anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, anger.

I never heard voices on my head tbh that's pretty weird

you are NPC

 

[MarriedAndLookin4Fun]

Didnt read but did read

 

[starystulejarz]

Didnt read but did read

900 iq move

 

[Deleted member 20659]

Same tbh, having weird thoughts and impulses. I also might do psychodelics soon to schizomaxx

 

[i_a_m_i]

I've thought so too, but it doesn't bother me that much. My thinking is that if I'm sane enough to recognize my own insanity, then I'm not actually insane.

 

[Deleted member 8353]

I've thought so too, but it doesn't bother me that much. My thinking is that if I'm sane enough to recognize my own insanity, then I'm not actually insane.

Yeah that a good point, it's obvious that I'm aware enough of how strange my experiences are, so I can't be that bad.

 

[wizardcel]

not just from my waifu when I go to sleep,

Have you created an imaginary girlfriend?

 

[Deleted member 8353]

Have you created an imaginary girlfriend?

She is my avi tbh, so it's only a half truth to say that I created her. It's more like I tried to construct the idea of her within my head.