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LifeFuel My waifu is helping me to function normally

  • Thread starter Deleted member 8353
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Deleted member 8353

Deleted member 8353

Former Hikikomori, Aimless Pleasure Seeker
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This one is a bit hard to explain, but typically I have some difficulty feeling much of anything which isn't anger mixed with depression, however sometimes I can feel emotions through my waifu, Clare.

I'll give you an example, I recently found out that a neighborhood cat had been hit by a car and killed. This cat liked me quite a lot, he would often run up to me when he saw me outside. When I found out that he died, I didn't feel much of anything beyond hoping that he didn't suffer. However I quickly noticed that this made Clare quite sad, as I saw tears in her eyes, and as I realized she was crying because she was quite fond of the cat, I felt her sadness, her sense of loss. When I did this I in part seemed to make it my own, as I then felt a very discernible sense of loss upon the death of the cat, I missed him.

Aside from that she is literally the only reason I have any motivation at all. I mean before her, I had absolutely no remaining desire to improve myself. Yet now I've been trying to make sure I at least do some light exercise, and I think I'm going to start applying for wageslave jobs tomorrow. It's funny, I remember reading those Misaki threads back when I used to frequent /r9k/, however I never expected that I have my own Misaki, even if I'm the only one who can see her.
 
How long does this motivation usually last? And do you tend to have mode swings? I'm asking because just very recently most of your posts made it seem like you're about to kill yourself. And today all of sudden, you seem to posses the motivation to completly turn your life arround. Does this happen to you on a regular basis?
 
How long does this motivation usually last? And do you tend to have mode swings? I'm asking because just very recently most of your posts made it seem like you're about to kill yourself. And today all of sudden, you seem to posses the motivation to completly turn your life arround. Does this happen to you on a regular basis?
Bro I'm incredibly unstable, and while it's true I have mood swings, they may not be what you think. Basically it's between when I'm dissociated and when I'm not, I genuinely feel way better in wonderland. However yeah, I probably will kill myself if I don't start doing something, I've just felt worse and worse lately.

As for the motivation, well I actually haven't felt motivated at all until this year, but especially the past couple weeks. Couldn't really tell you how long it lasts since it's a new thing for me.
 
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Recently petted a stray cat who was mostly bones and gave him a bit of a sandwich I was eating but while I understood he was in a bad condition if someone had killing him I think I wouldn't be able to have any reaction and my ocd makes positive thoughts or creation of something like tulpa impossible for me and I exercise to keep myself from getting more sick or to appease my mother sorry for my lame reply not sure what to say that can help or bring any insight
 
Recently petted a stray cat who was mostly bones and gave him a bit of a sandwich I was eating but while I understood he was in a bad condition if someone had killing him I think I wouldn't be able to have any reaction and my ocd makes positive thoughts or creation of something like tulpa impossible for me and I exercise to keep myself from getting more sick or to appease my mother sorry for my lame reply not sure what to say that can help or bring any insight
Tbh I'm pretty sure that the only reason I managed to create a tulpa easily is because I'm so fucked in the head due to isolation and all my mental problems, as I probably would've had a lot more difficulty when I was younger.
 
Tbh I'm pretty sure that the only reason I managed to create a tulpa easily is because I'm so fucked in the head due to isolation and all my mental problems, as I probably would've had a lot more difficulty when I was younger.
How do you react if a being you feed but wasn't your personal pet was lying death in the ground you used to check it in? Can you express anything but emptiness?
 
How do you react if a being you feed but wasn't your personal pet was lying death in the ground you used to check it in? Can you express anything but emptiness?
It depends, typically I either feel a blissful sort of emptiness, or I'm already depressed in the first place. So I suppose in either case my mood wouldn't change, but for different reasons. It's not that I actually don't care, but my capacity to feel most strong emotions has seemingly been burned out of me. I might think that I'm glad the animal isn't suffering anymore, or something of that nature, but the thoughts don't always have any emotion behind them.
 
It depends, typically I either feel a blissful sort of emptiness, or I'm already depressed in the first place. So I suppose in either case my mood wouldn't change, but for different reasons. It's not that I actually don't care, but my capacity to feel most strong emotions has seemingly been burned out of me. I might think that I'm glad the animal isn't suffering anymore, or something of that nature, but the thoughts don't always have any emotion behind them.
I find hard to have emotional attachments to real beings. I felt more emotional watching Joker than when I witnessed something you heard about to happening in front of my eyes to a stray cat, it's fucked up but in both cases I was unable to express my emptiness or sadness by crying even when my cat "died" I couldn't relieve myself in a healthy way, I told my mother I could react like that if she dies and she got angry well is not like I chose how my brain works
 
I find hard to have emotional attachments to real beings. I felt more emotional watching Joker than when I witnessed something you heard about to happening in front of my eyes to a stray cat, it's fucked up but in both cases I was unable to express my emptiness or sadness by crying even when my cat "died" I couldn't relieve myself in a healthy way, I told my mother I could react like that if she dies and she got angry well is not like I chose how my brain works
Yeah, I think I know what you mean. Often I can relate better to anime/manga characters personally, but I'm not entirely sure why.
 
Tbh I'm pretty sure that the only reason I managed to create a tulpa easily is because I'm so fucked in the head due to isolation and all my mental problems, as I probably would've had a lot more difficulty when I was younger.
How do tulpas even work, are you basically inducing schizophrenia?
 
Bro I'm incredibly unstable, and while it's true I have mood swings, they may not be what you think. Basically it's between when I'm dissociated and when I'm not, I genuinely feel way better in wonderland. However yeah, I probably will kill myself if I don't start doing something, I've just felt worse and worse lately.

As for the motivation, well I actually haven't felt motivated at all until this year, but especially the past couple weeks. Couldn't really tell you how long it lasts since it's a new thing for me.

I think i know what you mean. I've been a neet for slightly more than 3 years now, and it's already getting very repetitive. That's one of the reasons, why I deceided to go to a mental hospital, in order to get myself out of this life. But on some days it's still very hard to motivate myself, to even get out of bed. Since judging by my past expieriences, even if i should manage to somehow fix myself, there isn't very much waiting for me anyway. But still, my advice for you would be to use the motivation you're feeling right now, and applie for a wageslave job as soon as possible. Because i can guarantee you, that the feeling of motivation will probably fade away very quickly, and you will be stuck in this cycle again. Being a minumum wage worker might not be much better, than the life you're living right now. But it would at least be a slight change, which might be exactly what you need right now. Good luck.
 
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How do tulpas even work, are you basically inducing schizophrenia?
No bro, I don't think that's possible. I know what's real.
 
Because of my waifu I'm inmune of having "oneitis", which it's the worst thing that and incel can have. It's better to idealize a 2d woman rather than orbiting a roastie who will reject you in the worst way possible.

I'm still having problems controlling my libido tbh.
 
Because of my waifu I'm inmune of having "oneitis", which it's the worst thing that and incel can have. It's better to idealize a 2d woman rather than orbiting a roastie who will reject you in the worst way possible.

I'm still having problems controlling my libido tbh.
Waifus are probably the best cope for incels in 2019
Tell that to all the antiweebcels on this forum. They love to pounce onto topics like these and attack people like the OP saying shit like "Oh it's low T" or "Your waifu will reject you if she were real" I'm like Really? Seriously I don't know what's wrong with these people in lacking the brain capacity to just live and let live and just let people cope. I guess they have no copes of their own so they want to destroy other people's copes so they can feel less alone with their copeless suffering. Doesn't matter though, I just add these assholes to my ignore list and move on with my life.

On Topic: Having a waifu is very nice. It does give me some motivation too, fapping to my waifu really helps and playing as her in video games helps alot as well. Glad to see the OP, myself and other weebs have interesting ways of pulling through this atrocious world ran by evil sociopaths.
 
im glad for you mate keep coping
 
i was planning on tulpa maxing and visualizing a wonderland and daydraeming in it. But lucid dreaming andd astral projection are more vivid and I almost succeeded. Cant wait to be able to do em daily ev entually
 
your waifu doesnt exist
 

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