Venting Mother thinks I should he grateful with what I have (implying I should forget what I don't have: a gf/wife) - gaslighting!

[TheGrayWolf]

She tells me I have:

- roof over head, bed, food on the table, safe life, etc.
- study at a college (via online/distance learning)
EDIT - "you're not disabled" (just remembered this after comment by Sleepycel)

"So many people don't have a roof over their head, food, etc., why can't you be more grateful?!" (She directly said I should stop complaining about being short, and also implied I should stop complaining about my looks.)

"I never had the opportunities you have." (which is a true but unfair statement)

- Overall, she wants me to focus on all this "good" stuff and forget the "other" stuff (having a gf) – she calls having a gf "luxury" and "the other stuff is more important"

-She always tries to list the negatives of having a gf and how annoying it can be (maybe true but I won't let myself be manipulated)

She says friends are more important, and wants me to make friends, her goal being that I won't want a gf anymore than (the copium here is insane)

 

[Sleepycell]

Yea same witb me my mom always gaslights me like that telling me altleast im not disabled

 

[wereq]

She tells me I have:

- roof over head, bed, food on the table, safe life, etc.

My dad tells me the EXACT same thing. What he doesn't realize that there's more to life than the comfortable stagnation of eating and sleeping.

"So many people don't have a roof over their head, food, etc., why can't you be more grateful?!" (She directly said I should stop complaining about being short, and also implied I should stop complaining about my looks.)

When my dad tells me this, I say to him that those people should kill themselves because they have no hope of ascension.

 

[Nate Higgers]

As manipulative as she is, she is trying her best to cheer you up i hope that you can keep that in mind despite being justifiably angry about this

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Yea same witb me my mom always gaslights me like that telling me altleast im not disabled

Brutal, mine said that too months ago, I just remembered. She has always known it's over for me (I'm 26 and unsurprisingly still a KHHV), now she tells herself I'm rude to her and I have so much good stuff going for me (other than the fact that I'm very short and very strange looking) - so she doesn't have to feel bad about my forever-alone inceldom.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

My dad tells me the EXACT same thing. What he doesn't realize that there's more to life than the comfortable stagnation of eating and sleeping.

When my dad tells me this, I say to him that those people should kill themselves because they have no hope of ascension.

Brutal and you're right. My mother always provokes me, so I get rude, now she tells me how I'm always so rude... ultimately, she doesn't have to feel bad for her son's forever-alone inceldom, because he's always rude to her after all. That's literally how it is.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

As manipulative as she is, she is trying her best to cheer you up i hope that you understand that despite being justifiably angry because of this

True. I do understand.

Her goal is that I don't want a gf anymore, as she knows I can't get one. I just don't appreciate being manipulated.

What she said multiple times over the past 2 years:
("Relationships are very overrated"; "it's never as good as you think"; "you can be happy alone, just like our 40 year old neighbour [2 houses down], she's happy alone"; "you'll have lots of fights"; "she'll cheat on you"; "friends are more important than having a gf"; "you'll always have to have a clean room"; and probably some more phrases I can't remember right now).

 

[RegularManlet]

Every time I see TheGrAyWolf talk about his mother I read every word.

I think she is saying friends are more important than girlfriend so that you will socialcirclemaxx and incidentally be open to having a GF

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Every time I see TheGrAyWolf talk about his mother I read every word.

Thanks. And I grinned at this

I think she is saying friends are more important than girlfriend so that you will socialcirclemaxx and incidentally be open to having a GF

Could be! But she knows I want a gf.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Why does she think I can be manipulated?

 

[comegetsomecurry]

Why does she think I can be manipulated?

She isn't trying to manipulate you. She is trying to help you.

I think she is saying friends are more important than girlfriend so that you will socialcirclemaxx and incidentally be open to having a GF

Facts.

 

[RegularManlet]

She isn't trying to manipulate you. She is trying to help you.



Facts.

Yeah because its somewhat of a prerequisite to finding a GF, even if you do not find foids by socialcirclemaxxing, a foid will be put off by no friends or social life or anything going for you, loneliness and inceldom is such a rough vicious cycle.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

She isn't trying to manipulate you. She is trying to help you.

Semantics. From her view it's helping, but it's ultimately manipulation because she's trying to influence my opinion, feelings and wants.

 

[TheGrayWolf]

She isn't trying to manipulate you. She is trying to help you.

sorry I thought this was another post.

She said these things in the past:

"Relationships are very overrated. It's never as good as you think."

"There are more important things in life than relationships/having a gf."

"You'll have lots of fights, arguments and problems."

"She'll likely cheat on you especially if she's good-looking."

"You're not the type to marry or have kids."

"Having friends is more important than having a gf." [She wants me to make friends and tells herself I'll be content with friends only.]

"You can be happy alone, our neighbour's daughter [who is about 40, has short her and when she's not at work she's at her parent's house - our neighbours] is happy alone too and doesn't want a bf."

- yet, she completely ignores the negatives of being a loner without a gf.

Facts.

 

[Phosphorus]

Brutal. Parents can never understand inceldom because it’s their natural instinct to expect grandchildren. The crazier part is she wouldn’t go for a short
guy so she knows other women wouldn’t as well.

 

[Friezacel]

Tell her next time she has a cold or if she has back pain that she should stop complaining because there are people with cancer who have it way worse