To put things in perspective, he grew up on my street. We had the same socioeconomic status, the same normal parents, the same education, and even played on the same hockey team as kids. The only thing that is notably different is that he is able to have a life due to his slightly above average looks. I’ll give you a brief timeline of how things went down:
2015: we both enter highschool on the same level, same grades, same classes, only he has grown over the summer. He starts getting invited to parties, he asks if I can come along, the answer is usually no. We still game together on weekends.
2016: He gets his first girlfriend. A girl who I actually really noticed first, telling him I found her attractive. Her and I had been talking. It soon became clear she just wanted to use me to get close to him. Soon the gaming weekends aren’t as frequent. He goes out with his girl every weekend, and to more parties, meanwhile I try to just focus on school to get myself somewhere in life.
2017: At graduation he has a beautiful date. At the tables we have to choose another family to sit with, and everyone is sitting with their dates. I ask if he wants to sit at my table, for old times sake. He laughs and tells me to get a date. I ask three girls. They all say no. I end up at a table with an Asian kid I’ve spoken to twice, one of the only other guys left without a date. No one dances with me. I go home after alone. He goes out to a party. I cry myself to sleep but look forward to going to college.
2018: He goes to school for business, I get accepted into a science program. We go to different colleges but still talk from time to time. Over Christmas break he asks about all my experiences. I don’t tell him that I just sat in my room for months on end. He has a new girlfriend and tons of stories to tell. I act like they are relatable. After that I don’t see him again, it’s my choice, it just makes me too sad.
2019: we have no contact but I see his social media posts, he’s doing amazing. He’s so happy. Why is his life so much better than mine?
2020: I run into him one day at the gas station. His beautiful girlfriend is in the car. He wants to introduce me to her and she seems uninterested but I say hi. When she closes the door he tells me he’s Graduating a year in advance due to a summer internship program that was offered to him: he didn’t even apply. Meanwhile I’m working as a busboy despite putting hours on end into school. I don’t know what I want to do with my life. I feel hopeless.
2021: Him and his girlfriend move into a beautiful apartment. I become increasingly withdrawn. He reaches out and tells me I don’t put effort into anything and that’s why I struggle.
2022: he has a career, he proposed to his girlfriend soon. I haven’t even kissed a girl, and I’m still stuck without any career opportunities despite giving it my best effort. His parents ask my parents what I’m up to, and they have nothing to tell. I wasn’t invited to the wedding because she didn’t know me well enough and she made the invite list. I won’t be there to see my childhood best friend get married, but I’m glad, it would only hurt me to see him with all of his successful friends and a woman who adores him.
2015: we both enter highschool on the same level, same grades, same classes, only he has grown over the summer. He starts getting invited to parties, he asks if I can come along, the answer is usually no. We still game together on weekends.
2016: He gets his first girlfriend. A girl who I actually really noticed first, telling him I found her attractive. Her and I had been talking. It soon became clear she just wanted to use me to get close to him. Soon the gaming weekends aren’t as frequent. He goes out with his girl every weekend, and to more parties, meanwhile I try to just focus on school to get myself somewhere in life.
2017: At graduation he has a beautiful date. At the tables we have to choose another family to sit with, and everyone is sitting with their dates. I ask if he wants to sit at my table, for old times sake. He laughs and tells me to get a date. I ask three girls. They all say no. I end up at a table with an Asian kid I’ve spoken to twice, one of the only other guys left without a date. No one dances with me. I go home after alone. He goes out to a party. I cry myself to sleep but look forward to going to college.
2018: He goes to school for business, I get accepted into a science program. We go to different colleges but still talk from time to time. Over Christmas break he asks about all my experiences. I don’t tell him that I just sat in my room for months on end. He has a new girlfriend and tons of stories to tell. I act like they are relatable. After that I don’t see him again, it’s my choice, it just makes me too sad.
2019: we have no contact but I see his social media posts, he’s doing amazing. He’s so happy. Why is his life so much better than mine?
2020: I run into him one day at the gas station. His beautiful girlfriend is in the car. He wants to introduce me to her and she seems uninterested but I say hi. When she closes the door he tells me he’s Graduating a year in advance due to a summer internship program that was offered to him: he didn’t even apply. Meanwhile I’m working as a busboy despite putting hours on end into school. I don’t know what I want to do with my life. I feel hopeless.
2021: Him and his girlfriend move into a beautiful apartment. I become increasingly withdrawn. He reaches out and tells me I don’t put effort into anything and that’s why I struggle.
2022: he has a career, he proposed to his girlfriend soon. I haven’t even kissed a girl, and I’m still stuck without any career opportunities despite giving it my best effort. His parents ask my parents what I’m up to, and they have nothing to tell. I wasn’t invited to the wedding because she didn’t know me well enough and she made the invite list. I won’t be there to see my childhood best friend get married, but I’m glad, it would only hurt me to see him with all of his successful friends and a woman who adores him.
