Life has been incredibly brutal, man. Ever since COVID hit, everything has gone downhill. I've been stuck inside my room, feeling like I'm rotting away. I lost all my friends, not that I had many to begin with. I had maybe a small group of five friends from 3rd to 8th grade, but I don't remember much about them. I have a bad memory in general and struggle to remember, except for the times we used to play games after school. Those moments were fun, and we did it every day. But after we graduated, we didn't keep in touch much, or at all, actually. It's kind of funny, but since I struggle to make new friends, I sometimes find myself thinking about them. I used to have them on PS4 and some other social media platforms, but those accounts got banned. When I tried to reach out to them on PS4, they always ignored me. I did manage to talk to them once on Discord, but that was it. I didn't say much because I find it difficult to have a normal conversation, especially after spending so much time isolated during COVID. I sometimes check their Instagram profiles too. Just recently, I saw one of the guys online on the Epic Store friend list. He's following an ecchi account on instagram, which made me laugh.
The guy following the ecchi account is actually quite smart and is probably going to a good college. As for me, I'm repeating 12th grade now, believe it or not, because of insomnia or anxiety. I haven't been able to sleep properly for months, which has led to me missing school. And when I do go, I often skip lunch to walk around until school ends because I can't handle being in school. None of my old friends there talk to me; it's like I'm invisible to them. I still remember during 11th grade, when my friends and I went to buy food during lunch. They ended up leaving me in the store because they literally forgot about me. It's frustrating because they are truecels. One of them is a 5'3 beancel, and the other is 5'10 but not very attractive. They always wear hoodies and masks to cover up their faces. I feel completely invisible to them.
Its over. I watch my old friends talking to each other while I sit by myself in the back. I see their Instagram stories, knowing they have probably forgotten all about me. It's truly disheartening, man.
I don't want to rope, but I don't enjoy living either. I am young but idk if life will get better with age.
The guy following the ecchi account is actually quite smart and is probably going to a good college. As for me, I'm repeating 12th grade now, believe it or not, because of insomnia or anxiety. I haven't been able to sleep properly for months, which has led to me missing school. And when I do go, I often skip lunch to walk around until school ends because I can't handle being in school. None of my old friends there talk to me; it's like I'm invisible to them. I still remember during 11th grade, when my friends and I went to buy food during lunch. They ended up leaving me in the store because they literally forgot about me. It's frustrating because they are truecels. One of them is a 5'3 beancel, and the other is 5'10 but not very attractive. They always wear hoodies and masks to cover up their faces. I feel completely invisible to them.
Its over. I watch my old friends talking to each other while I sit by myself in the back. I see their Instagram stories, knowing they have probably forgotten all about me. It's truly disheartening, man.
I don't want to rope, but I don't enjoy living either. I am young but idk if life will get better with age.
