Scene: Handsome Jack's office in Hyperion Corporation. Rick Sanchez suddenly appears through a portal.
Rick: Well, well, well, look who it is. Handsome Jack, the friggin' hero of Pandora. Ah, crap, this place is as pretentious as I remember.
Handsome Jack: Rick Sanchez, the interdimensional tomfuckery enthusiast. What a surprise. Shouldn't you be busy destroying galaxies or something?
Rick: Oh, you know me, Jack. I like to take breaks from my amaze-balls adventures to visit friggin' rich megalomaniacs like yourself. It's like a hobby, except it's a complete waste of time.
Handsome Jack: Ah, yes, coming from the genius who spends his time turning his family's lives into a chaotic mess. That's real awesome sauce, Rick.
Rick: Oh, spare me the moral lecture, Jackhole. At least I don't pretend to be a hero while running an empire built on the suffering of others. You're like a jackoff in a fancy suit.
Handsome Jack: (smirking) Coming from a guy who calls himself a scientist while getting drunk on alien booze, you sure know how to sling insults, don't you, Rick?
Rick: Watch your tone, friggin' dictator wannabe. I've seen through your schemes, your power grabs, and your constant need for validation. It's like you have a chip on your shoulder the size of Pandora.
Handsome Jack: (leaning back in his chair) You think you're real smart, Rick. But let me remind you that I built an empire while you're just a washed-up scientist with a portal gun. Guess we know who the real champ is.
Rick: (laughs sarcastically) Oh, yeah, you're so awesome, Jack. The way you manipulate people, the way you use and discard them like champagne bottles. Truly awe-inspiring. If being a soulless bastard is your definition of success, then congratulations.
Handsome Jack: (leaning forward, voice dripping with sarcasm) Thanks for the compliments, Rick. Coming from you, they mean the world. It's always a pleasure to have a conversation with a nutcase like yourself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have more important things to do than entertain your self-righteous ass.
Rick: (rolls his eyes) Oh, yeah, I'm sure you're really busy. Just remember, Jack, one day your tower of lies is going to crumble, and when that happens, I'll be there, watching and laughing. Enjoy your friggin' delusions of grandeur.
Rick opens a portal and disappears, leaving Handsome Jack seething with rage.
Handsome Jack: (gritting his teeth) Friggin' Rick Sanchez. What an awesome encounter. Can't wait for the next one.
Rick: Well, well, well, look who it is. Handsome Jack, the friggin' hero of Pandora. Ah, crap, this place is as pretentious as I remember.
Handsome Jack: Rick Sanchez, the interdimensional tomfuckery enthusiast. What a surprise. Shouldn't you be busy destroying galaxies or something?
Rick: Oh, you know me, Jack. I like to take breaks from my amaze-balls adventures to visit friggin' rich megalomaniacs like yourself. It's like a hobby, except it's a complete waste of time.
Handsome Jack: Ah, yes, coming from the genius who spends his time turning his family's lives into a chaotic mess. That's real awesome sauce, Rick.
Rick: Oh, spare me the moral lecture, Jackhole. At least I don't pretend to be a hero while running an empire built on the suffering of others. You're like a jackoff in a fancy suit.
Handsome Jack: (smirking) Coming from a guy who calls himself a scientist while getting drunk on alien booze, you sure know how to sling insults, don't you, Rick?
Rick: Watch your tone, friggin' dictator wannabe. I've seen through your schemes, your power grabs, and your constant need for validation. It's like you have a chip on your shoulder the size of Pandora.
Handsome Jack: (leaning back in his chair) You think you're real smart, Rick. But let me remind you that I built an empire while you're just a washed-up scientist with a portal gun. Guess we know who the real champ is.
Rick: (laughs sarcastically) Oh, yeah, you're so awesome, Jack. The way you manipulate people, the way you use and discard them like champagne bottles. Truly awe-inspiring. If being a soulless bastard is your definition of success, then congratulations.
Handsome Jack: (leaning forward, voice dripping with sarcasm) Thanks for the compliments, Rick. Coming from you, they mean the world. It's always a pleasure to have a conversation with a nutcase like yourself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have more important things to do than entertain your self-righteous ass.
Rick: (rolls his eyes) Oh, yeah, I'm sure you're really busy. Just remember, Jack, one day your tower of lies is going to crumble, and when that happens, I'll be there, watching and laughing. Enjoy your friggin' delusions of grandeur.
Rick opens a portal and disappears, leaving Handsome Jack seething with rage.
Handsome Jack: (gritting his teeth) Friggin' Rick Sanchez. What an awesome encounter. Can't wait for the next one.
