This is a story from my early days at uni, where I currently still am. Technically it begins a little before I started, in summer 2022.
Shortly before leaving home to start school, my dad and I attended a "send-off" event at a large house in an affluent neighborhood. This was supposed to be a time where kids from around my home region (who were going to attend the same uni) came to meet up and also meet alumni. Being the chronic bedroom-dweller I was, the sheer sensory deluge of the crowd and everyone shouting over everyone else was overwhelming. I wandered/stood around, barely speaking to anyone, while my dad went off to talk with some of the other parents.
While I was on the patio near the edge of the crowd, a pretty girl in cute outfit caught my eye, but she didn't seem to notice me. A short time later though, we somehow started talking. There was an older gentleman who was apparently trying to facilitate people meeting each other, and he sort of brought us together. She waved at me and then we made introductions—we exchanged majors and I tried to be interesting by asking her questions, but eventually I ran out of things to say and it came to an end. She said "nice to meet you" and walked away. The experience gave me a surge of confidence—my autistic ass had actually talked to a girl I found attractive! I left the event with optimism for the future, a glimmer of hope that I might in fact have a college girlfriend from the very beginning.
Because I never got any contact info of the girl, I had to rely on chance meeting to get things rolling again. I got that opportunity after a couple months of school, in late September 2022. I was in line for ice cream at a dining hall and she happened to be behind me. I worked up enough confidence to re-introduce myself, but it went quite badly—I could feel my legs physically shaking as I tried to speak, and my words fell flat. It was strange how different the girl acted on this day to when I had first met her. She was cold and suspicious, showed zero interest in talking to me, and didn't even seem to remember who I was until I awkwardly brought up the send-off event. I left without getting any contact again, and that was the last time I ever spoke to her.
After that, I would go on to see her a handful of times in passing throughout my subsequent time at uni; eventually she began dating some other guy. I saw them eating dinner together once a few months ago, and while by then I had no real interest left in the girl, it was still a brutal sight to see. So, I came into uni with hollow hopes and false expectations that didn't yield even a single date, much less a partner. And here I am 1.5 years later—still a pathetic KHHV
Shortly before leaving home to start school, my dad and I attended a "send-off" event at a large house in an affluent neighborhood. This was supposed to be a time where kids from around my home region (who were going to attend the same uni) came to meet up and also meet alumni. Being the chronic bedroom-dweller I was, the sheer sensory deluge of the crowd and everyone shouting over everyone else was overwhelming. I wandered/stood around, barely speaking to anyone, while my dad went off to talk with some of the other parents.
While I was on the patio near the edge of the crowd, a pretty girl in cute outfit caught my eye, but she didn't seem to notice me. A short time later though, we somehow started talking. There was an older gentleman who was apparently trying to facilitate people meeting each other, and he sort of brought us together. She waved at me and then we made introductions—we exchanged majors and I tried to be interesting by asking her questions, but eventually I ran out of things to say and it came to an end. She said "nice to meet you" and walked away. The experience gave me a surge of confidence—my autistic ass had actually talked to a girl I found attractive! I left the event with optimism for the future, a glimmer of hope that I might in fact have a college girlfriend from the very beginning.
Because I never got any contact info of the girl, I had to rely on chance meeting to get things rolling again. I got that opportunity after a couple months of school, in late September 2022. I was in line for ice cream at a dining hall and she happened to be behind me. I worked up enough confidence to re-introduce myself, but it went quite badly—I could feel my legs physically shaking as I tried to speak, and my words fell flat. It was strange how different the girl acted on this day to when I had first met her. She was cold and suspicious, showed zero interest in talking to me, and didn't even seem to remember who I was until I awkwardly brought up the send-off event. I left without getting any contact again, and that was the last time I ever spoke to her.
After that, I would go on to see her a handful of times in passing throughout my subsequent time at uni; eventually she began dating some other guy. I saw them eating dinner together once a few months ago, and while by then I had no real interest left in the girl, it was still a brutal sight to see. So, I came into uni with hollow hopes and false expectations that didn't yield even a single date, much less a partner. And here I am 1.5 years later—still a pathetic KHHV
