B
Years ago, when I learned about the blackpill and how it affected or lives much beyond the dating market, but as in the professional market, it made me feel broke, I was already hated at my university. People avoided me, the teachers didn't liked me as well and the few people that tried to get close to me, used me to make all the hard work in group projects, it made my 5 years course become 7 and it was still was far beyond to finish it.
I wasn't able to do internships, and failed in interviews, which all of them were made by women, by the way. I was completely lost, with no hope at all of succeeding in life. I saw my future as living alone with no money. My parents are already very old. If they died, I would not be able to sustain myself and I would become a hobo. I was sad and with rage, with lots of rage, made me have really bad thoughts, because it was just not fair that I'm unsuccessful with relationships and also a failure in the professional world.
So, in a last act of desperation, I prayed...I prayed from the bottom of my heart until I cried. My family raised me as a Catholic but I never believed in God, Demons or whatever, but that whole night I called for any God that would be listening. I didn't care who it was or what was their vision/concept of good and evil, I just asked for one simple thing, help me to have a job good enough that I can sustain myself and cope with my hobbies. I didn't asked to be rich but to have enough money to live a decent life, to be able to help my old parents and to live after they are gone.
What did I use in the exchange? I said, since it is already a lost cause and I have no hope, I said may I never lose my virginity, may I never feel what is love from a woman, so be it that I die alone and never have a family or friends, but let me at least have enough money to live my solitude comfortable.
I didnt think much about it at the time, but 4 years after that and I have already finished college, have a job with a salary that makes me in the top 5% earners in my country. I'm good at my job, have an ok car, I gathering money to buy my own home, my parents have no problem with money for house dispense and they can use their own money to buy the medication they need, which is very expensive.
I'm still a virgin, going to be 30-year-old wizard pretty soon, never kissed, never was hugged by a woman besides family, but I'm coping really well. I think I may find peace living alone, but whatever chance I had, even if small, is gone, in that time I went to the gym, did facial surgery, and of course, made money, but even after all that, it was not enough and part of that, I suspect it was the payment I gave for the entity, even tried to hire whores, but they ignored me.
It's now over for me in a spiritual level.
I wasn't able to do internships, and failed in interviews, which all of them were made by women, by the way. I was completely lost, with no hope at all of succeeding in life. I saw my future as living alone with no money. My parents are already very old. If they died, I would not be able to sustain myself and I would become a hobo. I was sad and with rage, with lots of rage, made me have really bad thoughts, because it was just not fair that I'm unsuccessful with relationships and also a failure in the professional world.
So, in a last act of desperation, I prayed...I prayed from the bottom of my heart until I cried. My family raised me as a Catholic but I never believed in God, Demons or whatever, but that whole night I called for any God that would be listening. I didn't care who it was or what was their vision/concept of good and evil, I just asked for one simple thing, help me to have a job good enough that I can sustain myself and cope with my hobbies. I didn't asked to be rich but to have enough money to live a decent life, to be able to help my old parents and to live after they are gone.
What did I use in the exchange? I said, since it is already a lost cause and I have no hope, I said may I never lose my virginity, may I never feel what is love from a woman, so be it that I die alone and never have a family or friends, but let me at least have enough money to live my solitude comfortable.
I didnt think much about it at the time, but 4 years after that and I have already finished college, have a job with a salary that makes me in the top 5% earners in my country. I'm good at my job, have an ok car, I gathering money to buy my own home, my parents have no problem with money for house dispense and they can use their own money to buy the medication they need, which is very expensive.
I'm still a virgin, going to be 30-year-old wizard pretty soon, never kissed, never was hugged by a woman besides family, but I'm coping really well. I think I may find peace living alone, but whatever chance I had, even if small, is gone, in that time I went to the gym, did facial surgery, and of course, made money, but even after all that, it was not enough and part of that, I suspect it was the payment I gave for the entity, even tried to hire whores, but they ignored me.
It's now over for me in a spiritual level.
