Deta97
Suicidal Alchemist and Dreamer
★★★★★
- Joined
- May 31, 2021
- Posts
- 963
I hate it when my mother or anyone gives me the "you're pissing me off" phrase like it's a threat, for merely disagreeing and suggesting something that doesn't fit their little box of beliefs. All I did was merely suggest mom to use 12% hydrogen peroxide for the mildew and all that instead of bleach. And I should have the right to be upset and disagree with her considering, I ruin my clothes when using the spray she switches up with bleach.
It literally brings some unpleasant memories with a few other people in the family, when I tell them they're wrong about what they say about me and their gaslighting, about how I pull a knife on Nana when in truth, I had a knife alone in the kitchen with it on my wrist trying to cut myself... How I supposedly hit and threw applesauce at you in that heated altercation, when I spilt it trying to free myself and all that, and so on. Mom and them have so little self-awareness that they just deem me the monster when I lash out at them. Her and their anger is NOTHING, to the rage I had built up in the past 20 years, unable to let it out. I had to hold back for so long that if I cut loose, I could literally cross the line the worse way possible and burn every bridge imaginable, but I choose not to.
Then she tells me about what her therapist tells her about me being "a burden"?! That stupid femoid knows nothing about what I've mentioned to my therapist, but I have enough self-awareness to mention my faults, even the ones I would rather take to the grave. I'm talking about a time I've snapped and became what I hated, using a racial slur just to goad my grandfather into making his first move in an argument.
Back to her, I couldn’t let that go, she's already tried bullying me into being what I ought to be with her ridiculous standards of being a family man despite knowing I'm not like them, nor am I built that way, and with this, I decided to confront her, telling her, "Don't ever tell me I'm pissing you off like some intimidation tactic. The last person who did that (my grandfather), it ended badly."
She ended up telling me how I do nothing but use up the toilet paper, and everything else I've mentioned here, despite me doing things around the apartment for them, or buying detergent for them and shit.
It literally brings some unpleasant memories with a few other people in the family, when I tell them they're wrong about what they say about me and their gaslighting, about how I pull a knife on Nana when in truth, I had a knife alone in the kitchen with it on my wrist trying to cut myself... How I supposedly hit and threw applesauce at you in that heated altercation, when I spilt it trying to free myself and all that, and so on. Mom and them have so little self-awareness that they just deem me the monster when I lash out at them. Her and their anger is NOTHING, to the rage I had built up in the past 20 years, unable to let it out. I had to hold back for so long that if I cut loose, I could literally cross the line the worse way possible and burn every bridge imaginable, but I choose not to.
Then she tells me about what her therapist tells her about me being "a burden"?! That stupid femoid knows nothing about what I've mentioned to my therapist, but I have enough self-awareness to mention my faults, even the ones I would rather take to the grave. I'm talking about a time I've snapped and became what I hated, using a racial slur just to goad my grandfather into making his first move in an argument.
Back to her, I couldn’t let that go, she's already tried bullying me into being what I ought to be with her ridiculous standards of being a family man despite knowing I'm not like them, nor am I built that way, and with this, I decided to confront her, telling her, "Don't ever tell me I'm pissing you off like some intimidation tactic. The last person who did that (my grandfather), it ended badly."
She ended up telling me how I do nothing but use up the toilet paper, and everything else I've mentioned here, despite me doing things around the apartment for them, or buying detergent for them and shit.
Last edited: