Deleted member 30198
The Marked God of the Blackpill
-
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2020
- Posts
- 2,341
On this forum I usually like to read threads with [Brutal] and/or [Ragefuel] tags, but today I browsed the [Suicidefuel] and [It's Over] ones.
I don't have the link, but I read a thread that talks about the OPs truecel friend that roped, and described their situation as incels.
I went to take a bath and was thinking about the thread while also thinking about my life. When I turned on the shower, I involuntarily cried like a fucking bitch, thinking about how shitty my frame is, how my ribs are prominent when I'm shirtless, how weak and fragile my bones and muscles are, and how it seems like my T levels are shit, even though I am youngcel at HS (I do not have morning woods, and it's becoming hard to fap because my tiny dick does not get hard so easily anymore). I'm not even a coomer, but my penis does not work very well.
It was the only time that I could feel involuntary contractions on my abdomen and my face muscles contracting, which probably generated something similar to a baby crying for the first time. I couldn't do anything, just cry while the water of the shower fell on my body.
I hate myself for this crap. I should be strong, I should be big framed, I should be at least 180cm.
But I'm not. Even though my father is tall (186cm), my mother produced 3 offspring of similar height. My oldest brother is 175cm, the middle one is 174cm, and I'm 172cm. My mom is 155cm. Because of my father impregnating her, he had 3 at best average-sized sons.
At my age, my 2 brothers had similar body sizes to mine. They stopped growing at 16, which seems the case to me, and they are not strong-framed, which I also ain't.
I got the worst bone and muscle genetic recombination though. They were stronger than me at my age, and I believe not by a great margin (which might be a cope).
I did not grew up normally. I played PlayStation 2 starting by 6 years old, and I do not remember well which games, but I believe it was a mix of GTA San Andreas and GTA Vice City. I never played with other kids normally, I always had poor motor coordination skills, and I was always shamed and mocked by it.
I learned to read at 5-6 years old, and some people like my mom said that I am intelligent (which probably isn't the case. My IQ is average) because of my supposed writing skills. I believe that these has to do something with estrogen exposure while I was in the womb of my mom, which made my brain more language-oriented than mathematical-logic oriented. Even though that might be the case, I am shit at speaking with foidlets. Before the C-Virus I entered a course that teached school-shit themes, like math and chemistry shit, and thus I was able to enter a technic school called Etec (Escola Técnica Estadual) and I am making a computing technic course there (I am at sophomore year of HS). I get brutally body-mogged and intelectually-mogged by the boys there, and I get also thug-mogged. They have GFs, they are not virgins anymore, and they still have better grades than me.
It's so frustating being an average-IQcel and seeing all these moggers at your school doing nothing and getting better grades, while also being better with women.
Because of my poor coordination skills, PE classes are like hell for me, and I get brutally coordination-mogged by the boys AND the girls there. The teachers treat me better and more childlike because they know I'm so hopeless. I'm grateful for that.
One of my autistic friends there got a GF in junior year, and I don't fucking know how. He is taller and bigger-framed than me, but his face is sub5. His GF is cute but a little chubby, if she left him and dated me, I would fuck her until my tiny dick fell off.
The sadness and sorrow filling my soul are becoming overwhelming. I'm becoming doubtful of whether or not I'm gonna not have roped by 25. Some time ago I thought I could endure a life of loneliness, but I'm not so sure now.
You guys are strong, brocels. I respect your endurance throughout your lifetimes, because at 16yo I am already thinking of roping, while some of you are already 30 and still enduring this hell on earth.
I want to be a game developer. I installed Unity and started to make some prototypes proposed by the Junior Programmer Unity learning course, and I suppose I am going well so far. Programming is not easy for me, as I am average-IQcel, but I'm pushing forward with C#.
I wish the best for you brocels. I just wanted to vent in this thread.
I don't have the link, but I read a thread that talks about the OPs truecel friend that roped, and described their situation as incels.
I went to take a bath and was thinking about the thread while also thinking about my life. When I turned on the shower, I involuntarily cried like a fucking bitch, thinking about how shitty my frame is, how my ribs are prominent when I'm shirtless, how weak and fragile my bones and muscles are, and how it seems like my T levels are shit, even though I am youngcel at HS (I do not have morning woods, and it's becoming hard to fap because my tiny dick does not get hard so easily anymore). I'm not even a coomer, but my penis does not work very well.
It was the only time that I could feel involuntary contractions on my abdomen and my face muscles contracting, which probably generated something similar to a baby crying for the first time. I couldn't do anything, just cry while the water of the shower fell on my body.
I hate myself for this crap. I should be strong, I should be big framed, I should be at least 180cm.
But I'm not. Even though my father is tall (186cm), my mother produced 3 offspring of similar height. My oldest brother is 175cm, the middle one is 174cm, and I'm 172cm. My mom is 155cm. Because of my father impregnating her, he had 3 at best average-sized sons.
At my age, my 2 brothers had similar body sizes to mine. They stopped growing at 16, which seems the case to me, and they are not strong-framed, which I also ain't.
I got the worst bone and muscle genetic recombination though. They were stronger than me at my age, and I believe not by a great margin (which might be a cope).
I did not grew up normally. I played PlayStation 2 starting by 6 years old, and I do not remember well which games, but I believe it was a mix of GTA San Andreas and GTA Vice City. I never played with other kids normally, I always had poor motor coordination skills, and I was always shamed and mocked by it.
I learned to read at 5-6 years old, and some people like my mom said that I am intelligent (which probably isn't the case. My IQ is average) because of my supposed writing skills. I believe that these has to do something with estrogen exposure while I was in the womb of my mom, which made my brain more language-oriented than mathematical-logic oriented. Even though that might be the case, I am shit at speaking with foidlets. Before the C-Virus I entered a course that teached school-shit themes, like math and chemistry shit, and thus I was able to enter a technic school called Etec (Escola Técnica Estadual) and I am making a computing technic course there (I am at sophomore year of HS). I get brutally body-mogged and intelectually-mogged by the boys there, and I get also thug-mogged. They have GFs, they are not virgins anymore, and they still have better grades than me.
It's so frustating being an average-IQcel and seeing all these moggers at your school doing nothing and getting better grades, while also being better with women.
Because of my poor coordination skills, PE classes are like hell for me, and I get brutally coordination-mogged by the boys AND the girls there. The teachers treat me better and more childlike because they know I'm so hopeless. I'm grateful for that.
One of my autistic friends there got a GF in junior year, and I don't fucking know how. He is taller and bigger-framed than me, but his face is sub5. His GF is cute but a little chubby, if she left him and dated me, I would fuck her until my tiny dick fell off.
The sadness and sorrow filling my soul are becoming overwhelming. I'm becoming doubtful of whether or not I'm gonna not have roped by 25. Some time ago I thought I could endure a life of loneliness, but I'm not so sure now.
You guys are strong, brocels. I respect your endurance throughout your lifetimes, because at 16yo I am already thinking of roping, while some of you are already 30 and still enduring this hell on earth.
I want to be a game developer. I installed Unity and started to make some prototypes proposed by the Junior Programmer Unity learning course, and I suppose I am going well so far. Programming is not easy for me, as I am average-IQcel, but I'm pushing forward with C#.
I wish the best for you brocels. I just wanted to vent in this thread.